College Quotes

A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education.

Theodore Roosevelt

If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to a library.

Frank Zappa

Education is a private matter between the person and the world of knowledge and experience, and has little to do with school or college.

Lillian Smith

A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.

John Ciardi

A great many college graduates come here thinking of lawyers as social engineers arguing the great Constitutional issues.

Archibald Cox

Some people get an eduction without going to college the rest get it after they get out.

Mark Twain

Americans are the only people in the world known to me whose status anxiety prompts them to advertise their college and university affiliations in the rear window of their automobiles.

Paul Fussell

Colleges are places where pebbles are polished and diamonds are dimmed.

Robert Green Ingersoll

It is not so important to be serious as it is to be serious about the important things. The monkey wears an expression of seriousness which would do credit to any college student, but the monkey is serious because he itches.

Robert Hutchins

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

Woody Allen, Annie Hall

All schools, all colleges have two great functions to confer, and to conceal valuable knowledge. - Notebook, 1908.

Mark Twain

I was resolved to sustain and preserve in my college the bite of the mind, the chance to stand face to face with truth, the good life lived in a small, various, highly articulate and democratic society.

Virginia Crocheron Gildersleeve

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

Woody Allen

Hamlet is the tragedy of tackling a family problem too soon after college.

Tom Masson

A college degree is not a sign that one is a finished product but an indication a person is prepared for life.

Reverend Edward A. Malloy

At best, most college presidents are running something that is somewhere between a faltering corporation and a hotel.

Leon Botstein

A college education never hurt anybody who was willing to learn after he got it.

Author Unknown

I remember how, in college, I got that part - Time job as a circus clown, and how the children would laugh and laugh at me. I vowed, then and there, that I would get revenge.

Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

We are shut up in schools and college recitation rooms for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bellyful of words and do not know a thing.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Cauliflower is nothing but Cabbage with a College Education.

Mark Twain

The aim of the college, for the individual student, is to eliminate the need in his life for the college the task is to help him become a self - Educating man.

C. Wright Mills

Colleges hate geniuses, just as convents hate saints.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

Mark Twain

Changing a college curriculum is like moving a graveyard - - You never know how many friends the dead have until you try to move them!

Calvin Coolidge or Woodrow Wilson

The scramble to get into college is going to be so terrible in the next few years that students are going to put up with almost anything, even an education.

Barnaby C. Keeney

Colleges typically did not tell you that ninety percent of your education came after you hung the parchment on the wall. People might ask for a rebate.

Tom Clancy, "The Teeth Of The Tiger" - - Page 180

College football would be more interesting if the faculty played instead of the students - There would be a great increase in broken arms, legs and necks.

H. L. Mencken

Every man should have a college education in order to show him how little the thing is really worth.

Elbert Hubbard

We are students of words; we are shut up in schools, and colleges, and recitation rooms, for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bag of wind, a memory of words, and do not know a thing.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

We are students of words: we are shut up in schools, and colleges, and recitation - Rooms, for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bag of wind, a memory of words, and do not know a thing.

Ralph Waldo Emerson