Mark Twain Quotes
Education consists mainly in what we have unlearned. - Notebook, 1898.Mark Twain
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.Mark Twain
Imagination is always the fabric of social life and the dynamic of history. The influence of real needs and compulsions, of real interests and materials, is indirect because the crowd is never conscious of it.Mark Twain
Those that respect the law and love sausage should watch neither being made.Mark Twain
We all live in the protection of certain cowardices which we call our principles.Mark Twain
I did it partly because it was worth it, but mostly because I shall never have to do it again.Mark Twain
An enemy can partly ruin a man, but it takes a good - Natured injudicious friend to complete the thing and make it perfect.Mark Twain
Somewhere between the Angels and the French lies the rest of humanity.Mark Twain
A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom that he can no longer be led by the nose.Mark Twain
I have spent most of my time worrying about thigs that have never happened.Mark Twain
The universal brotherhood of man is our most precious possession.Mark Twain
My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.Mark Twain
If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill always came together, who would escape hanging?Mark Twain
So far as I am able to judge, nothing has been left undone, either by man or nature, to make India the most extraordinary country that the sun visits on his rounds. Nothing seems to have been forgotten, nothing overlooked.Mark Twain
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.Mark Twain
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.Mark Twain
It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either.Mark Twain
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.Mark Twain
There ought to be a room in every house to swear in.Mark Twain
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.Mark Twain
Friendship is the marriage of the soul, and this marriage is liable to divorce.Mark Twain
Man is the only animal that blushes - - Or needs to.Mark Twain
When I was a child people simply looked about them and were moderately happy today they peer beyond the seven seas, bury themselves waist deep in tidings, and by and large what they see and hear makes them unutterably sad.Mark Twain
Religion consists in a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain of.Mark Twain
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.Mark Twain
It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you: the one to slander you, and the other to bring the news to you.Mark Twain
Describing her first day back in grade school after a long absence, a teacher said, It was like trying to hold 35 corks under water at the same time.Mark Twain
A patriot is mocked, scorned and hated; yet when his cause succeeds, all men will join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.Mark Twain
It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.Mark Twain
The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.Mark Twain
The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.Mark Twain
It could probably be show by facts and figures that there is no distinctively native American criminal class except Congress.Mark Twain
Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.Mark Twain
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence then success is sure.Mark Twain
Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.Mark Twain
Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.Mark Twain
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.Mark Twain
