Mark Twain Quotes
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.Mark Twain
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.Mark Twain
When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people.Mark Twain
Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.Mark Twain
We are chameleons, and our partialities and prejudices change place with an easy and blessed facility, and we are soon wonted to the change and happy in it.Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but Cabbage with a College Education.Mark Twain
The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.Mark Twain
Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.Mark Twain
It is discouraging to try and penetrate a mind like yours. You ought to get it out and dance on it. That would take some of the rigidity out of it.Mark Twain
There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact.Mark Twain
Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.Mark Twain
Those that respect the law and love sausage should watch neither being made.Mark Twain
Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody.Mark Twain
I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.Mark Twain
Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.Mark Twain
We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - And stop there lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove - Lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove - Lid again - And that is well but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.Mark Twain
It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.Mark Twain
A lie can travel halfway round the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.Mark Twain
Golf is a good walk, ruined.Mark Twain
Carlyle said, A lie cannot live; it shows he did not know how to tell them.Mark Twain
Often, the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.Mark Twain
I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.Mark Twain
It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you the one to slander you, and the other to get the news to you.Mark Twain
Drag your thoughts away from your troubles.. by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.Mark Twain
After all these years I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning it is better to live outside the Garden with her than inside it without her.Mark Twain
Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.Mark Twain
Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.Mark Twain
A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.Mark Twain
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.Mark Twain
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence - - And then success is sure.Mark Twain
It is the difference of opinion that makes horse races.Mark Twain
Be good and you will be lonesome.Mark Twain
Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.Mark Twain
Somewhere between the Angels and the French lies the rest of humanity.Mark Twain
Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.Mark Twain
Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.Mark Twain
Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable.Mark Twain
