Mark Twain Quotes
It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you the one to slander you, and the other to get the news to you.Mark Twain
Golf is a good walk, ruined.Mark Twain
The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right.Mark Twain
Behold, the fool saith, Put not all thine eggs in the one basket, - - which is but a manner of saying, Scatter your money and your attention, but the wise man saith, Put all your eggs in the one basket and - - watch that basket.Mark Twain
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - Not absence of fear.Mark Twain
Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.Mark Twain
There ought to be a room in every house to swear in.Mark Twain
A patriot is mocked, scorned and hated; yet when his cause succeeds, all men will join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.Mark Twain
It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not to deserve them.Mark Twain
It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.Mark Twain
We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - - And stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit on a hot stove lid again - - And that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.Mark Twain
When in doubt, tell the truth.Mark Twain
Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.Mark Twain
Pessimism is only the name that men of weak nerve give to wisdom.Mark Twain
The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.Mark Twain
Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.Mark Twain
Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow - Mindedness.Mark Twain
We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.Mark Twain
Sacred cows make the best hamburger.Mark Twain
I smoke in moderation, only one cigar at a time.Mark Twain
It could probably be show by facts and figures that there is no distinctively native American criminal class except Congress.Mark Twain
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.Mark Twain
Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.Mark Twain
There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it. How strange it is. It is like paying out your whole fortune for a cow that has gone dry.Mark Twain
It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly American criminal class except Congress.Mark Twain
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.Mark Twain
Golf is a good walk spoiled.Mark Twain
I can live two months on a good compliment.Mark Twain
At the beginning of a great national change, the patriot is a scarce man: scorned, ridiculed and forgotten. When his cause succeeds, however, all men will join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.Mark Twain
When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.Mark Twain
Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand.Mark Twain
Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principle one was that they escaped teething.Mark Twain
It is easier to stay out than get out.Mark Twain
Friendship is the marriage of the soul, and this marriage is liable to divorce.Mark Twain
Never tell the truth to those unworthy of it....Mark Twain
The universal brotherhood of man is our most precious possession.Mark Twain
So far as I am able to judge, nothing has been left undone, either by man or nature, to make India the most extraordinary country that the sun visits on his rounds. Nothing seems to have been forgotten, nothing overlooked.Mark Twain
