Mark Twain Quotes
It is discouraging to try and penetrate a mind like yours. You ought to get it out and dance on it. That would take some of the rigidity out of it.Mark Twain
A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.Mark Twain
Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.Mark Twain
Some men worship rank, some worship heroes, some worship power, some worship God, and over these ideals they dispute, but they all worship money.Mark Twain
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.Mark Twain
Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody.Mark Twain
Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.Mark Twain
We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - And stop there lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove - Lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove - Lid again - And that is well but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.Mark Twain
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist, except an old optimist.Mark Twain
In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language.Mark Twain
If you take a dog which is starving and feed him and make him prosperous, that dog will not bite you. This is the primary difference between a dog and a man.Mark Twain
There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race and finish the farce.Mark Twain
Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.Mark Twain
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.Mark Twain
A man is accepted into church for what he believes - - And turned out for what he knows.Mark Twain
A man with a new idea is a crank - - Until the idea succeeds.Mark Twain
Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds upon the heel that crushes it.Mark Twain
I was born modest. Not all over, but in spots.Mark Twain
I never let schooling interfere with my education.Mark Twain
Imagination is always the fabric of social life and the dynamic of history. The influence of real needs and compulsions, of real interests and materials, is indirect because the crowd is never conscious of it.Mark Twain
Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow - Mindedness.Mark Twain
Some people get an eduction without going to college the rest get it after they get out.Mark Twain
Education consists mainly in what we have unlearned. - Notebook, 1898.Mark Twain
Pessimism is only the name that men of weak nerve give to wisdom.Mark Twain
Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion.Mark Twain
I must have a prodigious quantity of mind it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up.Mark Twain
There ought to be a room in every house to swear in.Mark Twain
I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.Mark Twain
Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.Mark Twain
The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.Mark Twain
Fleas can be taught nearly anything a congressman can.Mark Twain
Man is the only animal that blushes - - Or needs to.Mark Twain
I have never examined the subject of humor until now. I am surprised to find how much ground it covers. I have got its divisions and frontiers down on a piece of paper. I find it defined as a production of the brain, as the power of the brain to produce something humorous, and the capacity of percieving humor.Mark Twain
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.Mark Twain
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.Mark Twain
Youth, large, lusty, loving - Youth, full of grace, force, fascination. Do you know that Old Age may come after you with equal grace, force, fascination.Mark Twain
