Mark Twain Quotes
Often, the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.Mark Twain
The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right.Mark Twain
It is noble to teach oneself, it is still nobler to teach others.Mark Twain
Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.Mark Twain
When in doubt, tell the truth.Mark Twain
The miracle, or the power, that elevates the few is to be found in their industry, application, and perseverance under the prompting of a brave, determined spirit.Mark Twain
There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it. How strange it is. It is like paying out your whole fortune for a cow that has gone dry.Mark Twain
In our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either.Mark Twain
It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you the one to slander you, and the other to get the news to you.Mark Twain
Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of congress but I repeat myself.Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but Cabbage with a College Education.Mark Twain
It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them.Mark Twain
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.Mark Twain
Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.Mark Twain
It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not to deserve them.Mark Twain
Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable.Mark Twain
There are times when one would like to end the whole human race, and finish the farce.Mark Twain
I must have a prodigious quantity of mind it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up.Mark Twain
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.Mark Twain
I did not attend his funeral, but I wrote a nice letter saying I approved it.Mark Twain
In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language.Mark Twain
I have a prejudice against people who print things in a foreign language and add no translation. When I am the reader, and the other considers me able to do the translating myself, he pays me the quite a nice compliment - - But if he would do the translating for me I would try to get along without the compliment. A Tramp Abroad, 1880.Mark Twain
Be good and you will be lonesome.Mark Twain
Behold, the fool saith, Put not all thine eggs in the one basket, - - which is but a manner of saying, Scatter your money and your attention, but the wise man saith, Put all your eggs in the one basket and - - watch that basket.Mark Twain
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - Not absence of fear.Mark Twain
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.Mark Twain
Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow - Mindedness.Mark Twain
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.Mark Twain
All schools, all colleges have two great functions to confer, and to conceal valuable knowledge. - Notebook, 1908.Mark Twain
Statistics show that we lose more fools on this day than on all other days of the year put together. This proves, by the numbers left in stock, that one Fourth of July per year is now inadequate, the country has grown so.Mark Twain
In Marseilles they make half the toilet soap we consume in America, but the Marseillaise only have a vague theoretical idea of its use, which they have obtained from books of travel.Mark Twain
There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress.Mark Twain
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.Mark Twain
I never let schooling interfere with my education.Mark Twain
We are chameleons, and our partialities and prejudices change place with an easy and blessed facility, and we are soon wonted to the change and happy in it.Mark Twain
Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away, and a sunny spirit takes their place.Mark Twain
George Washington as a boy was ignorant of the commonest accomplishments of youth - He could not even lie.Mark Twain
