Mark Twain Quotes
The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them.Mark Twain
Often, the surest way to convey misinformation is to tell the strict truth.Mark Twain
One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.Mark Twain
A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.Mark Twain
Get your facts first and then you can distort them as much as you wish.Mark Twain
The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.Mark Twain
Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.Mark Twain
Man is the only animal that blushes - - Or needs to.Mark Twain
Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.Mark Twain
I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.Mark Twain
If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be - - A christian.Mark Twain
After all these years I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning it is better to live outside the Garden with her than inside it without her.Mark Twain
I smoke in moderation, only one cigar at a time.Mark Twain
To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler - - And less trouble.Mark Twain
Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.Mark Twain
Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.Mark Twain
The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up.Mark Twain
Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.Mark Twain
Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion.Mark Twain
Some people get an eduction without going to college the rest get it after they get out.Mark Twain
Principles have no real force except when one is well - Fed.Mark Twain
Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.Mark Twain
Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.Mark Twain
Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.Mark Twain
Describing her first day back in grade school after a long absence, a teacher said, It was like trying to hold 35 corks under water at the same time.Mark Twain
The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are right.Mark Twain
The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.Mark Twain
We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - - And stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit on a hot stove lid again - - And that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.Mark Twain
There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact.Mark Twain
Let us not be too particular; it is better to have old secondhand diamonds than none at all.Mark Twain
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.Mark Twain
When one has tasted watermelon he knows what the angels eat.Mark Twain
When in doubt, tell the truth.Mark Twain
A man with a new idea is a crank - - Until the idea succeeds.Mark Twain
Forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.Mark Twain
It is noble to teach oneself, it is still nobler to teach others.Mark Twain
It has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain when awake.Mark Twain
